[ Sweet Naga-- Time and place, Akutagawa! Time and place! Even though the other's intent clearly isn't bad here, Inigo still startles when he sees the other's power activate, and he looks even more surprised when he's suddenly wrapped up in it and lifted up. Even more so when he always hates the feeling of his feet not touching the air - there's something scary about it.
So Inigo's breathlessness? It's actually turning into loud, surprised wheezing now. It's not a pretty sight.
Please put this boy down before this gets even more embarrassing, Akutagawa.. ]
[What is wrong with this boy? Wasn’t this suppose to stop him from over exerting himself? Clearly not. He’s not putting you down young boy just yet. He swings Inigo to a couch and eventually sets him down, nicely thank goodness. Please keep your vomit in.]
And - more thankfully for Inigo on a personal level - he is back on the ground again. Or on a couch, but considering that couch is not currently flying through the air, he'll take it for now. He definitely is letting out a relieved sigh.. does that count as a breath? At least he's actually on the couch now, so maybe Akutagawa can have some hope of Inigo actually resting..
He doesn't even address his small flight through the air just now, since Inigo's mind immediately jumps back to the cause he came here for in the first place. His head turns to the side, worried eyes looking at Akutagawa as he manages to force out between the breaths he's slowly catching again-- ]
Are you alright?
[ Aku, you don't understand!! This is so important!! He's so worried about you, dude!! ]
[Inigo needs to find his breathing pattern again first. The airborne question will have to be put on hold.
Akutagawa’s back faces Inigo as he watches the heat and kettle work together, focusing mostly on the kettle for some grounding. When the question pings from him, the answer was abrupt and calm.]
I’m fine.
[People come and go. He told himself. This isn’t their home. He told himself. They have a mission to fulfill. He continues to recite this to himself.
[ Inigo goes quiet for a moment at the answer. Not even because he still has to catch his breath, but because of the answer itself. It's so simple, and yet.. Inigo knows it can't be true. How could it? There's no way Akutagawa could be fine when his boyfriend left.
Even if Inigo doesn't have a significant other, he can imagine the pain in that. He has lost people before too, after all.
It twists the boy's features, giving the other a sad, sympathetic look. It's not even like he thinks that's what Akutagawa wants - far from it - but he can't help it. Inigo feels so much for other people that it naturally appears on his face. ]
It's okay if you're not fine, you know. [ His voice is a little softer when he says that. ] It doesn't make you any less strong.
[He doesn’t look back, he can’t. Fear is keeping him from doing so, and he isn’t sure why. Both hands and extends out, anchoring on the counter in front of him as his head hung forward, focusing on the kettle.
The more Inigo questions this, more his mind shrouds in doubts.]
Then. What am I suppose to feel? [He answers back, softly, curious, and scared.]
[ Somehow it feels painful just to see the other like this. It doesn't feel fair. Vaeros brought them both here, so why would he send one of them back home without the other? Why would he separate two people who are so obviously in love?
It's not right. ]
But you miss him, don't you?
[ It's a gentle suggestion, knowing fully well that not being gentle about it is sure to set off Akutagawa, especially if he's emotional already. ]
I know it's better for anyone to not be here. The best thing of all would be if we could all go home right now. But-- We can't. And being stuck here without the people you care for.. That's painful for anyone. Everyone would feel the way you do right now if they were in your shoes.
[ Inigo frowns. His heart feels heavy, like he's about to cry, but he holds back his tears for the other's sake. ]
[Every word spat from the boy’s mouth continues to pound this man’s core, yet the mafioso stands motionless and silent. His body still tensed, suppressing himself.]
Yes. [He finally spoke.] That’s it.
[There was one time in his life he remembers where he felt himself anxious, when a certain person decided to vanish one day, without warning. This feeling now is different than before. Never had he felt this wave of emotions.]
What I’m feeling is this current whirlpool dragging me down to the ocean’s floor. I don’t know whether to swim out or…
[He voice trails quiet, and the kettle finally whistles the boiling is done.]
[ Inigo slowly gets up from where he flopped down on the couch. He's still a touch dizzy, but he's feeling well enough to walk a few steps in a straight line anyway. Just far enough that he can stand next to the other and put a gentle hand on Akutagawa's arm.
It's a risky move, given how sometimes the other can lash out, but-- what's the alternative? Just sit there and watch while the other is hurting?
Inigo couldn't do that. ]
You have to keep swimming. You know he'd want you to.
[ Inigo may not have known everything about Atsushi, but he knows this. The other would have cared enough about Akutagawa to want that. ]
But you don't have to swim on your own either. Sometimes you need people to help drag you back up to the water's surface, you know..?
[His arm twitches from that touch, nothing more. Akutagawa doesn’t acknowledge Inigo’s touch yet, he remained still and numb as his mind tried to process. Thinking back to his world, he recalled one or two events Akutagawa felt he let people down, because of his weakness. Yet, his comrades didn’t hesitate for a moment to lend a hand.
He was a tool. Weak tools should be disposed. Still, it didn’t stop some of his comrades.
This time, it was different. His body didn’t fall in defeat, his heart did. Atsushi returned, and soon Akutagawa will follow. After learning a terrible truth, uncertainty clouds his way.
Ah, the kettle is still whistling. Akutagawa slowly turned the knob on the burner off.
Back to Inigo’s question, he sighs quietly.]
I know.
[He could practically hear the tiger screaming in his mind too. Still avoiding eye contact, he continues—-]
I’m sorry you have to see me like this and.. thank you.
[ Inigo's voice is relatively quiet, and his hand still hasn't left the other's arm, as light as the touch is. ]
I know this might sound a little ridiculous to you. [ Given everything Akutagawa is. Everything the other seems to believe in. Inigo knows so little of the other's personal background, but there are some things he can guess at purely from the other's actions alone. ] But.. do you want to maybe try a hug?
[ Hugs always make him feel better, Akutagawa. :(
And he's got the feeling the other may not have had many before in his life. Except maybe from his boyfriend, but-- well, he's gone now. ]
[That bark came in an instant as Akutagawa turned his face to the other, disgusted at the thought. It’s almost as if Akutagawa was ready to bite the poor kid’s hand for that.]
[While the rejection was quick, Akutagawa fell silent again. Now staring at this poor youngling in this quiet space, he slowly recollects Inigo’s determination to be here and see the young man in distress.
Akutagawa’s twisted disgust expression slowly waned, one eyebrow twitched. Taking a deep breath, he huffs, exhaling any resilience weighing him down. He closed his eyes, and open them again.]
Make it quick.
[He averts his eyes away, tensing up his body as if Inigo was about to sucker punch him or something.]
[ Akutagawa doesn't exactly seem excited about it, huh.
For a moment Inigo wonders whether the other's slight giving in here means that Akutagawa may want to try hugging and see if it helps after all, or if he's just trying to do Inigo a favor. If it's the latter, Inigo kind of just wants to tell him that it's not like he has to do that, especially at a moment like this..
On the other hand, speaking up now might just make Akutagawa drag himself further back into his shell, so Inigo doesn't say anything. Instead he covers the slight distance left between them until he's right in front of the other guy, and then wraps his arms around Akutagawa's back, pulling the other into a hug.
It's very soft and warm, Akutagawa. I'm sorry to tell you this, but Inigo gives great hugs. Real loving. Don't suffer too much in its hold. ]
It's okay.
[ .. this is not a quick hug.
Sorry, dude. ]
I sometimes feel really lonely too. [ He lowers his voice a little as he says it, like Inigo doesn't like admitting to it.
But maybe Akutagawa won't feel so bad if he's not the only one here being vulnerable. ]
[Right now, its taking every ounce of fiber within him to not push this boy away. Akutagawa bears it, even when a minute feels eternal. He hated it.
It’s not quick as he hoped for. Still, it was.. not exactly as he expected. Inigo was warm, his squeeze was tight yet not brutal. The urge to sweep the boy away is held back as the man hummed to himself, perhaps to distract himself in some way or maybe… actually appreciating this.
Then, he said those words. Akutagawa doesn’t speak a word. He’s well aware the feeling of loneliness. Instead, he pat the boy’s back lightly.
[ The boy lets out a little huff of breath when he feels those pats on his back, and he finally - thankfully for Akutagawa, likely - pulls away and out of the hug, instead standing in front of the other again. ]
Why are you the one patting my back? [ He says - like he didn't just confess something pretty vulnerable. Inigo wouldn't be Inigo if he didn't immediately attempt to shove that under the rug. ] I'm the one trying to cheer you up here!
[While Akutagawa is thankful, somewhere in there, what Inigo did for him. While Inigo is defending some honor, Akutagawa is silent, simply watching the poor boy redeem himself, expressionless face and all. Sorry Inigo boy, either Akutagawa seems uninterested or it enters from one ear and out the other. Why? Because what he says next..]
There’s a spare room here free to use, if you like.
That last question is exactly what Inigo wonders too. He blinks over at the other, kind of unsure of what he's hearing here. Maybe Inigo is wondering if he heard that wrong, or maybe Akutagawa didn't intend that the way it sounds. Maybe he just meant that Inigo is looking so pathetic that he should rest in a room for a bit and then go..?
Surely it couldn't mean anything else, right?
Maybe that's why the boy looks so awkward as he asks, stammering: ]
Wha-- What do you mean?
[ Sorry, it seems that he'll have to be a little bit more direct than that. ]
[Is Inigo asking to be dragged to that room or something? The temptation is there as Akutagawa gave the boy a silent and questionable stare. Honestly, does he have to spell it out for this one as well?
Akutagawa sighed tiredly, arms crossed as he looked away, almost as if confessing to a crime.]
Inigo doesn't even dare to ask more, worried that he might push Akutagawa away, considering the other man is not one for talking extensively about these things. But at the same time he's so overwhelmed by the idea that someone might want him around. Let alone someone as prickly as Akutagawa.
So..
... ]
I, um..
[ Inigo's eyes sting, all of a sudden.
Akutagawa might be looking away, but if he looks back at Inigo at any point, he might see the tears that are starting to roll down the boy's cheeks. ]
.. thank you. It's-- It's the first time someone has told me that. [ It feels a little pathetic to admit to, but at the same time Inigo isn't sure he can convey just how thankful he is without adding this to it. To show Akutagawa how much it means to him as he speaks through his tears. ]
[He eventually looks back after hearing the crack from Inigo’s voice. His eyes widen for a moment, almost in disbelief, he’s… crying?
Was… More questions rose from his statement and honestly, Akutagawa was mentally exhausted. He stepped away quietly, because the kettle which remained on the stove, it was still whistling. He quietly removes the hot water before anything dangerous happens.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
monstercoat) wrote2023-05-08 01:13 pm
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So Inigo's breathlessness? It's actually turning into loud, surprised wheezing now. It's not a pretty sight.
Please put this boy down before this gets even more embarrassing, Akutagawa.. ]
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I’ll make us some tea.
[Perhaps with a bit of ginger.]
In the meantime, try to breathe.
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And - more thankfully for Inigo on a personal level - he is back on the ground again. Or on a couch, but considering that couch is not currently flying through the air, he'll take it for now. He definitely is letting out a relieved sigh.. does that count as a breath? At least he's actually on the couch now, so maybe Akutagawa can have some hope of Inigo actually resting..
He doesn't even address his small flight through the air just now, since Inigo's mind immediately jumps back to the cause he came here for in the first place. His head turns to the side, worried eyes looking at Akutagawa as he manages to force out between the breaths he's slowly catching again-- ]
Are you alright?
[ Aku, you don't understand!! This is so important!! He's so worried about you, dude!! ]
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Akutagawa’s back faces Inigo as he watches the heat and kettle work together, focusing mostly on the kettle for some grounding. When the question pings from him, the answer was abrupt and calm.]
I’m fine.
[People come and go. He told himself.
This isn’t their home. He told himself.
They have a mission to fulfill. He continues to recite this to himself.
Then. What is this painful swell in his chest?]
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[ Inigo goes quiet for a moment at the answer. Not even because he still has to catch his breath, but because of the answer itself. It's so simple, and yet.. Inigo knows it can't be true. How could it? There's no way Akutagawa could be fine when his boyfriend left.
Even if Inigo doesn't have a significant other, he can imagine the pain in that. He has lost people before too, after all.
It twists the boy's features, giving the other a sad, sympathetic look. It's not even like he thinks that's what Akutagawa wants - far from it - but he can't help it. Inigo feels so much for other people that it naturally appears on his face. ]
It's okay if you're not fine, you know. [ His voice is a little softer when he says that. ] It doesn't make you any less strong.
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The more Inigo questions this, more his mind shrouds in doubts.]
Then. What am I suppose to feel? [He answers back, softly, curious, and scared.]
He is home.
[That’s right.]
Away from this place.
[Away from…]
This should be fine…
[Right?]
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It's not right. ]
But you miss him, don't you?
[ It's a gentle suggestion, knowing fully well that not being gentle about it is sure to set off Akutagawa, especially if he's emotional already. ]
I know it's better for anyone to not be here. The best thing of all would be if we could all go home right now. But-- We can't. And being stuck here without the people you care for.. That's painful for anyone. Everyone would feel the way you do right now if they were in your shoes.
[ Inigo frowns. His heart feels heavy, like he's about to cry, but he holds back his tears for the other's sake. ]
.. I know I would.
Cw: drowning thought
Yes. [He finally spoke.] That’s it.
[There was one time in his life he remembers where he felt himself anxious, when a certain person decided to vanish one day, without warning. This feeling now is different than before. Never had he felt this wave of emotions.]
What I’m feeling is this current whirlpool dragging me down to the ocean’s floor. I don’t know whether to swim out or…
[He voice trails quiet, and the kettle finally whistles the boiling is done.]
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It's a risky move, given how sometimes the other can lash out, but-- what's the alternative? Just sit there and watch while the other is hurting?
Inigo couldn't do that. ]
You have to keep swimming. You know he'd want you to.
[ Inigo may not have known everything about Atsushi, but he knows this. The other would have cared enough about Akutagawa to want that. ]
But you don't have to swim on your own either. Sometimes you need people to help drag you back up to the water's surface, you know..?
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He was a tool. Weak tools should be disposed. Still, it didn’t stop some of his comrades.
This time, it was different. His body didn’t fall in defeat, his heart did. Atsushi returned, and soon Akutagawa will follow. After learning a terrible truth, uncertainty clouds his way.
Ah, the kettle is still whistling. Akutagawa slowly turned the knob on the burner off.
Back to Inigo’s question, he sighs quietly.]
I know.
[He could practically hear the tiger screaming in his mind too. Still avoiding eye contact, he continues—-]
I’m sorry you have to see me like this and.. thank you.
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[ Inigo's voice is relatively quiet, and his hand still hasn't left the other's arm, as light as the touch is. ]
I know this might sound a little ridiculous to you. [ Given everything Akutagawa is. Everything the other seems to believe in. Inigo knows so little of the other's personal background, but there are some things he can guess at purely from the other's actions alone. ] But.. do you want to maybe try a hug?
[ Hugs always make him feel better, Akutagawa. :(
And he's got the feeling the other may not have had many before in his life. Except maybe from his boyfriend, but-- well, he's gone now. ]
1/2
[That bark came in an instant as Akutagawa turned his face to the other, disgusted at the thought. It’s almost as if Akutagawa was ready to bite the poor kid’s hand for that.]
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Akutagawa’s twisted disgust expression slowly waned, one eyebrow twitched. Taking a deep breath, he huffs, exhaling any resilience weighing him down. He closed his eyes, and open them again.]
Make it quick.
[He averts his eyes away, tensing up his body as if Inigo was about to sucker punch him or something.]
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For a moment Inigo wonders whether the other's slight giving in here means that Akutagawa may want to try hugging and see if it helps after all, or if he's just trying to do Inigo a favor. If it's the latter, Inigo kind of just wants to tell him that it's not like he has to do that, especially at a moment like this..
On the other hand, speaking up now might just make Akutagawa drag himself further back into his shell, so Inigo doesn't say anything. Instead he covers the slight distance left between them until he's right in front of the other guy, and then wraps his arms around Akutagawa's back, pulling the other into a hug.
It's very soft and warm, Akutagawa. I'm sorry to tell you this, but Inigo gives great hugs. Real loving. Don't suffer too much in its hold. ]
It's okay.
[ .. this is not a quick hug.
Sorry, dude. ]
I sometimes feel really lonely too. [ He lowers his voice a little as he says it, like Inigo doesn't like admitting to it.
But maybe Akutagawa won't feel so bad if he's not the only one here being vulnerable. ]
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It’s not quick as he hoped for. Still, it was.. not exactly as he expected. Inigo was warm, his squeeze was tight yet not brutal. The urge to sweep the boy away is held back as the man hummed to himself, perhaps to distract himself in some way or maybe… actually appreciating this.
Then, he said those words. Akutagawa doesn’t speak a word. He’s well aware the feeling of loneliness. Instead, he pat the boy’s back lightly.
There, there, there.]
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Why are you the one patting my back? [ He says - like he didn't just confess something pretty vulnerable. Inigo wouldn't be Inigo if he didn't immediately attempt to shove that under the rug. ] I'm the one trying to cheer you up here!
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There’s a spare room here free to use, if you like.
[Did… Akutagawa offered him to stay?]
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That last question is exactly what Inigo wonders too. He blinks over at the other, kind of unsure of what he's hearing here. Maybe Inigo is wondering if he heard that wrong, or maybe Akutagawa didn't intend that the way it sounds. Maybe he just meant that Inigo is looking so pathetic that he should rest in a room for a bit and then go..?
Surely it couldn't mean anything else, right?
Maybe that's why the boy looks so awkward as he asks, stammering: ]
Wha-- What do you mean?
[ Sorry, it seems that he'll have to be a little bit more direct than that. ]
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Akutagawa sighed tiredly, arms crossed as he looked away, almost as if confessing to a crime.]
I mean you are welcome to stay here.
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[ What does he even say?
Inigo doesn't even dare to ask more, worried that he might push Akutagawa away, considering the other man is not one for talking extensively about these things. But at the same time he's so overwhelmed by the idea that someone might want him around. Let alone someone as prickly as Akutagawa.
So..
... ]
I, um..
[ Inigo's eyes sting, all of a sudden.
Akutagawa might be looking away, but if he looks back at Inigo at any point, he might see the tears that are starting to roll down the boy's cheeks. ]
.. thank you. It's-- It's the first time someone has told me that. [ It feels a little pathetic to admit to, but at the same time Inigo isn't sure he can convey just how thankful he is without adding this to it. To show Akutagawa how much it means to him as he speaks through his tears. ]
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Was… More questions rose from his statement and honestly, Akutagawa was mentally exhausted. He stepped away quietly, because the kettle which remained on the stove, it was still whistling. He quietly removes the hot water before anything dangerous happens.]
.. You’re welcome.
And, thank you.